Back To School Parenting

Well, it's finally here, the kids are heading back to school. Backpacks, textbooks, pens, pencils, homework, projects, after school activities; it all begins this week. And, we're happy about this. 

It's been a great summer! We've had some fun, did a little traveling, visited with family, enjoyed an amazing week at the beach, and made a lot of good memories. As a family, this summer marked a season of change as we prepared to send our second eldest off to college. That means we now have two in college, along with our younger three; a sophomore, a seventh grader, and a fourth grader. Life is changing.

As we get ready for the coming year,
we want to make the most of the time that's to come.

As we get ready for the coming year, we want to make the most of the time that's to come. So to help us slow down and be intentional about what's happening around us, we've decided to set a few goals for us as parents.

1. Intentional Engagement

This year, as parents, we are making a point to be intentionally engaging with our kids. With our two oldest boys, we left a lot of their junior and senior year responsibilities to them. Whether it was homework and assignments, class responsibilities or college applications, essays, and/or scholarship and grant research; we gave the boys the space to assert some independence. We encouraged them to do the work, problem solve, and find answers using the resources that were available to them. We had hoped that in doing so, our boys would learn how to navigate their years of college and young adulthood when we couldn't or wouldn't be there for them. And, for the most part, our boys have done well. They are learning how to deal with people, how to resolve conflicts, and how to own and correct their mistakes.

While in many ways, this has been good, we feel like we are missing out on some pretty important information during these crucial years. We've decided that we really want to be more involved as our kids move through these challenging waters. Our kids will still carry the responsibility of completing assignments on time and learning how to deal with teachers and peers. Our hope is to have more conversations around various issues and challenges they face.

We've also learned that in allowing our older boys space to make their own decisions, they missed out on some great opportunities because they neglected to respond, forgot to respond, or were completely unaware of that an opportunity existed. We value the life lessons that our kids are learning and believe that they will serve them as young adults. But we are learning that we still need to be involved in our kids schooling.

2. Limited Media

As a family, we love our media. We blog, vlog, share, like, post, and comment. We have a presence on Facebook, Twitter, YouTube, and Instagram. All but one have a cell phone. And everyone, has some kind of electronic device. We utilize Netflix, AppleTV, YouTube, and Amazon Prime Video, along with cable set up. Media is part of our lives.

​However, we are fully aware that media takes up a lot of our time! But, at the start of every school year, we reinstitute media restrictions that reduce the amount of time the kids spend on media to allow for school activities and assignments, sporting events and household chores. 

​This year will be no different. Starting on the first day of school, our kids will have set restrictions. These restriction will govern their media usage from the time they wake up til the time they come home, complete their assignments and chores, and ready themselves for the next day.

3. No More Settling for OK

We have smart kids. That's not to brag, that's just to say that we have capable, able-minded children who have the ability and potential to learn and do well. To settle for something mediocre or average is to take an easy road through their education. Our kids deserve better.

This year, we are committing to challenging our kids to strive for the excellence we know they are capable of. It's easy to settle and just cruise through the school year, but where's the challenge, where's the growth? We believe our kids have the ability to achieve for something greater. It's why we took our sons study hall period and switched it to a creative writing class; because he needs the challenge.

We don't expect 4.0+ GPAs and perfect SATs, but we do want our kids to learn how to work hard and strive for something better that average.

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We're looking forward to a great school year. Sure, we'll have our challenges and struggles. But, as parents, we realize that we need to be the ones that take ownership and responsibility for how the year shapes up. If we want our kids to strive to be all that God created them to be, then we need to be the parents that God has called us to be. And, that means we have to step up our game and do the things that parents should be doing.

- the higham family

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