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As we step into November, the idea of thankfulness is everywhere. After all, it's in November that we pause and reflect on the things we are thankful for. In recent years, the trend has become to countdown the days of the month posting the things we're thankful for to our social media.

Before you know it, we'll be sitting around the dinner table, sharing what we are most thankful for this year. But what do you do when it's been a tough year? What do you do when it's been a couple of tough years?

​What do you do when you've experienced loss, health challenges, financial difficulties, or life changing situations? How do you give thanks, when you're still in the midst of grief, struggle, or the unknown?

In 1 Thessalonians, we read these words, "16 Rejoice always, 17 pray continually, 18 give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus." (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 NIV)

Rejoice always. Pray continually. Give thanks in all circumstances. For this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus. What does this mean? Is it possible? And why should we?

2022 was a challenging year, far more challenging than we thought it would be. The start of the new year brought a diagnosis of cancer. The Spring brought surgery. The summer brought the loss of our fathers. We continued to deal with the fallout of emotions, healing, and grief for months. 

2023 was another year of challenge. We stepped out of ministry and into what we called a self-imposed sabbatical. We needed time to deal with all that 2022 threw at us. 2024 has been a year of refocusing. While we're not out of the wilderness, we are coming closer to the border.

In light of all of this, what does it look like to rejoice always? Pray continually, okay, we've been doing that. But, be thankful in all circumstances? Hmm. That's going to take some doing. So let's talk about this, and what it looks like to say thank you after a tough season.

After hearing that we were facing breast cancer, we determined, that no matter what, we were going to trust the Lord. That was a big statement, because at the time of diagnosis, we knew very little. There was no plan. We had questions. We had concerns. We had some fear. We weren't sure about what was going to happen next. In fact, we didn't even know what was next. But in the midst of all of if, we chose to trust.

What does it look like, "to trust?"

For us, we focused on what we knew to be true. God is God. And God is good.

Over the last 28 years of our marriage, we have watched as our good God, has proven himself over and over again and again. He has provided for us, protected us, paved ways for us, and positioned us to receive his blessing. God moved through people and situations, to show us that He was caring for us.

When we need to be reminded of God's faithfulness in our lives, we just have to look back at how he has shown up in the past. Because we have consistently God's hand on our life, we can rest in the knowledge that he is still working on our behalf. And, because God is good, we trust that he's working all things out for our good. That fact allows us to step into the unknown, trusting God.

We chose to trust God. And as we trusted, we were able to celebrate. With each step we took, we rejoiced through both the good and the bad. We rejoiced because we knew it wasn't about us. It was about what God was doing. He was drawing our family closer together, and we rejoiced. He was showing us our community of support, and we rejoiced. He was teaching us about love, and we rejoiced.

We rejoice because that's how you respond when God moves. We choose to rejoice in all circumstances.

​Verse 18 says, "give thanks in all circumstances."

​In all circumstances, give thanks. When it's good, give thanks. No problem. When it's not good, give thanks. Okay, that's a little different.

Right after Amy's surgery, we learned that her father wasn't well. He had been admitted into the hospital and it wasn't good.  On June 11th, he passed. About a week later, Jay's father was admitted into the hospital. The next week was up and down. But on July 4th, he passed. In less than a month, we lost both of our fathers. And if that wasn't enough, between the two deaths, we lost our family dog of 14 years, Toby.

Give thanks in all circumstances. What does that look like now? ​

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When you begin a journey with the promise to trust God, no matter what, you kind of have to stick to the promise. They weren't just words. We didn't say them to make ourselves feel better. We meant what we said. We were going to trust God, and that includes giving thanks. Fortunately, we had much to be thankful for. 

Amy's cancer was removed with her surgery. The follow up testing showed she was now cancer free. We were thankful.

An incredibly supportive community of friends and family surrounded us with prayer and cared for us. We were thankful.

Our father's both loved the Lord, their wives, and their children. Both lived and served God well. We are very thankful.

These last 3 years haven't been all bad. We had some good things happen as well. Our first born is successful. He's living on his own, has a great job, and is doing really well. We're thankful.

Our number two is married and has 2 amazing little ones. He has a job he enjoys. He's working hard, providing for his family, and hdoes his best to lead his family as a godly husband and father. We're thankful.

Number three is working full-time in job he loves. He's learning a ton of great skills that will benefit him for the rest of his life. He's fishing and practicing his photography, and hanging out with the family and his friends. We are thankful.

Number four is in college and doing great.  He's a hard worker, a leader among his peers, and is looking forward to what's to come. We're thankful.

Number five is in high school and growing up faster than we want. She's a good friend who others look up to and admire. We're thankful

And Amy and Jay, well, it's now 28 years together and we're still going strong. God continues to show us his faithfulness. And, yes, we are thankful.

​We have found that we have much to be thankful for. And while 2022, might have been a tough year, it pales in comparison to the good that God has shown us. We have so much to be thankful for. 

- the higham family

*** SPECIAL NOTE ***
Today's post was edited and adapted from it's original post from November of 2022. 2022 and 2023 were 2 years of transition and change. We continue to seek God for wisdom and direction. 
Our hope is that by resharing this post we might encourage you as you are on your journey.
Happy Thanksgiving!

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Welcome to day 2 of our Christmas in July celebration. All week long we are sharing some of our favorite posts, vlogs, and Christmas fun from over the years. Yesterday we kicked off the celebration with our 2023 living room decorating vlog. Today, we want to bring back a blog post that shares one of our most favorite Christmas traditions. 

When the kids were younger, we read a set of books that helped us  move through the Advent season towards Christmas. This series has become a treasure, having read each book with our kids. We continue to promote and share these books hoping that you and your family would come to love this Advent tradition.

Take a few minutes to read our original post from last November 2023. If the idea of these book encourages you, we would invite to you to order the series. Simply click on the book covers to over from Amazon. As you know, we are Amazon Affiliate Partners. When you purchase products that we recommend and share, using the links we provide, we receive a percentage of the purchase, at no additional cost to you. 

Now, let's get to today's post!

A number of years ago, the Higham family was introduced to an exciting Advent tradition. While serving as the youth pastor, our friends from the church asked if we had ever read a book called, Jotham's Journey, by Arnold Ytreeide. Of course we had not. But they said that this beloved story was an Advent must for their families. 

As the Christmas season approached, a family in the church shared their copy of Jotham's Journey with us. We started Advent and we began reading the first book of this 4 part series. Unfortunately, that year, our kids were still a little too young, and had a hard time finding interest in the story. The stories themselves included an intense glimpse of how life might have been during that time. There's suspense, drama, emotional moments, and cliffhangers that will keep the family on the edge of your seats. But by the next year, are kids were ready and we tried again. Success!

Advent is all about preparing for Christmas and the arrival of the Christ-child. From lighting candles to sharing in various devotions, the idea of having some kind of family Advent tradition is nothing new. But these adventurous storybooks help to reimagine the Nativity Story that helps the family prepare for Christmas morning.

Jotham's Journey was the first storybook we read as a family during Advent. Each chapter serves as a daily reading to be shared with the family. Each chapter stretches the adventure, leading both Jotham and the reader on an amazing journey. Within a couple of chapters our kids were hooked. Suspense, mystery, adventure, sword fights, good guys, bad guys, and edge-of-your-seat cliffhangers make this series an exciting must read Advent tradition. And it's been our tradition ever since.

We love these books and we want to share them with your family this Advent season!

Advent is an important part of the Christmas season. It helps to prepare our hearts for the arrival of the Christ-child. This year (2024), Advent begins on Sunday, December 1st. It would be great to think through what your Advent will look like. Daily devotions, candle lighting,  calendars, and LEGOs, there are plenty of ways to celebrate and prepare. If you would like to use the Jotham series with your family, now it the time to order your books. You can order using our Amazon affiliate links from this page. Because we are Amazon Affiliates, we earn a percentage of the sale without any additional cost to you. This percentage earned, helps to keep Life in the Higham House up and running.

If you have any questions about the series or Advent, or if you have a Advent tradition you practice with your family, we would love to hear from you! Please leave a comment below! If you are looking more Advent or Christmas ideas and fun, be sure to click on these links!

Thanks for reading!

​- jay & amy

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This Sunday starts what many commonly refer to as Holy Week. Simply put, Holy Week is the final days of Jesus' earthly ministry which include his arrest, trial, crucifixion, burial, and resurrection on Easter Sunday. It all kicks off this Sunday with Palm Sunday.

As we get ready for the events of Palm Sunday, Holy Week and Easter weekend, we wanted to offer some resources that we hope might help you and your family prepare and celebrate this special season of the year. So stating this Sunday, Palm Sunday, and continuing through Easter Sunday, we will be posting a daily blog with a Holy Week Family Devotion. With each devotion we will share a short thought, a family friendly activity, a video or videos, and resources that you can use with your kids.

​If you are from a traditional church that utilizes the Liturgy and the church calendar, you might be familiar with Holy Week. But if you are new to the faith, church, or you attend a more non-traditional church, you might be wondering what Holy Week is and why it's such an important week.

You might also be wondering why I used terms like traditional and non-traditional church. Well, a traditional church might be a church associated with a denominational connection. These would be churched that refer to themselves as Presbyterian, Methodist, Lutheran, Baptist, of Catholic. A non-traditional church might consider themselves as non-denominational or independent. Traditional churches generally, maintain or follow a Liturgical or church calendar that marks specific seasons, celebrations, and/or sacred days throughout the year. Some non-traditional churches choose to step away from those "traditions." Whether traditional or non-traditional, what's most important is that the church stay faithful to the gospel of Jesus Christ while maintaining Biblical teaching.

But what is Holy Week, and how do I share this with my kids?

That's a great question. As we've said, Holy Week marks the week between Palm Sunday, when Jesus enters Jerusalem to cheers and palms while riding the colt of a donkey, and Easter Sunday when he is raised from the tomb to life.

​Consider these two videos. The first, the video just above, is from the question and answer website of GotQuestions.com, an online resources that answers questions relating to the Bible, church, God, Jesus, the Holy Spirit, and faith. They do a great job explaining Holy Week, also known as Passion Week.

The second, the video below, is from Phil Vischer's, What's In the Bible, video series. Phil is the creator of VeggieTales and What's In the Bible, a video series that teaches kids the Bible. In the video below, Phil and his friends talk about Easter and the importance of what Jesus did for us on the cross. The video is crazy helpful and great to watch with your kids.

Hopefully you now have a better understanding of what Holy Week is, and why we take time to reflect and celebrate the events of this week. If you still have questions I would suggest you reach out to your pastor, youth pastor, or kids pastor and ask them to help you better understand Holy Week.

If you are not connected with a church, feel email us here at Life in the Higham House. We would be happy to help you in any way we can. You can also leave a question in the comments below!

Be sure to join us starting this Sunday, as we begin Family Devotions for Holy Week! Then check in with us every day through Holy Week for the daily devotion. Each day's post will go live at 9 AM EST.

It's going to be a great week.

Happy Easter!

​- jay & amy

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Easter is just around the corner, and like Christmas, it's a pretty special time for the Higham family. So we're getting ready by gathering together some of our favorite family resources, activities, snacks, vlogs, and fun.

And we're kicking things off with three Easter activities that are fun for the whole family. Take a few minutes to discover Resurrections Eggs, Holy Week and Easter Ideas from Focus on the Family, and the "You've been Egged" neighborhood activity.

Then be sure to check in for more Easter ideas, resources, and fun for you and your family! It's going to be a great Easter!

We have more Easter fun coming in the next couple of blog posts, so be sure to check back for some fresh content and material!

Happy Easter!

- jay & amy

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We tried something new this Christmas. We've never been a Christmas dinner family. We've always seen Christmas day as an opportunity to be together as a family. The thought of someone having to go and prepare a fancy dinner, taking them away from the fun, just didn't seem fair.  So instead of Christmas dinner, we would pick a few of our favorite appetizers and set them out for everyone to sample as the day wore on. This left plenty of space to try different traditions and meal ideas.

For example there were years where Jay would meet up with the family on Christmas eve at a local restaurant. Jay would be working at the church to get ready for the Christmas Eve services; lunch made for a nice break in the middle of what would be a very long day. Then there were years where we enjoyed Chinese Food for dinner. It all just depended on the day, services times, where we lived, and Jay's role on Christmas Eve. Last Christmas, we did try a Christmas dinner on Christmas day, but it just wasn't the same as our appetizer buffet.

This year we wanted to try something different. As our kids grow, so do their palettes and food interests. We heard friends of ours talking about a brisket that they smoked and ate on Christmas. It sound delicious. The problem was, we don't own a smoker. Nor have we ever smoked meat before. In fact, we didn't know anything about smoking meat. But hey, why not give it a try.

First things first, we needed the meat. For that, we picked up a 12 lb. brisket from the meat department of our local grocer. We weren't totally sure what we were looking for, but it was a nice piece of meat for a nice price. Because of our lack of experience, we knew we didn't want to spend a ton of money on something we might ruin. We got the meat.

Second, we needed to procure a smoker. We were in no position to drop a couple hundred dollars for a new smoker, nor were we ready to make such a commitment at this point. Then I had an idea. I wondered if there might be a way to convert my gas grill into a temporary smoker. So off to YouTube I went. Sure enough, I found a number of videos that show how to convert a gas grill into a smoker with just a few simple modifications. 

Of all the videos I watch, there were two that stood out as informative and instructional. I want to share these videos here, because they were so helpful.

The first is by Jaxx Drinkwater Southern Cooking & BBQ. Jaxx does a great job walking you through the ​steps of both converting the grill and setting up your brisket.

The second video comes from Shane at Payne County Rust. I found this video incredibly helpful. Like Jaxx, Shane walks you step by step through the process. However, I found Shane's video to be easy to follow as a "beginner."

As I watched the videos, I made notes on what materials I needed. A smoker box, drip pans, wood, dry rub, mister, and flavor injector. With a list of items and ingredients, it was time to go shopping. I'll leave links to similar items I bought below. You can pick up these items through our partnership with Amazon.

For the most part, I followed the steps laid out in Shane's video. I defatted the brisket, added some injectable flavoring, and applied the dry rub. For the flavoring I found a recipe on MasterClass.com, titled, Brisket Injection Recipe: How to Inject Brisket With Marinade. It was a simple recipe, easy to make, and delicious in the brisket. The rub was from Kinders. We chose the Woodfired Garlic Rub, which was great on the brisket.

I left the brisket sit over night in the refrigerator. Then on Friday, we fired up the grill, lit the wood chips we bought and started the process of smoking our first brisket.  We followed Shane's instructions, turning, misting, and added wood chips every couple of hours. 

When the brisket reached the designated temperature, I wrapped it in foil and let it rest in the oven at 250˚ for about 3 hours. At the 3 hour mark, we shut down the heat, and allowed the brisket to rest and cool over night in the oven.  

The next day, we warmed the brisket and sliced it for dinner. For a first time brisket, it turned out pretty good, and might end up being a new Christmas Eve tradition. Take 3 minutes and watch the video of our first smoked brisket.

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HAPPY NEW YEAR!

​- jay & amy 

We love our church, The Church of Eleven22. This past Sunday, was the start of the Advent season, and week one of our teaching series, Unwrapping Christmas. Pastor Joby presented one of the best messages about Christmas and the gospel! It was a powerful reminder of God's love for us, His purpose and plan for sending Jesus, and what the gospel looks like.

This Advent/Christmas season, we want to encourage you to rethink your Christmas and to consider for yourself, this gift that God has given to us through His Son, Jesus. Take a few minutes and listen or watch Sunday's message, Christmas From Eternity, with Pastor Joby. We hope it helps to set your holiday season in the right direction.

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Why do we celebrate Thanksgiving?

That's the question we asked our kids when they were little, "Why do we celebrate Thanksgiving? "

To be honest, we're not sure how we would have answered that question when we was a kid. Sure, we knew it had something to do with pilgrims and a boat and a big dinner to show their thanks. When we were little, the Wednesday before Thanksgiving was spent at church, participating in a service of thanksgiving. We knew that Thanksgiving was an opportunity to say, thank you, but thank you for what?

Sure we say things like, we're thankful for the blessings we've experienced, but are we really? Do we know enough about that first Thanksgiving and the events that preceded it to know why they were so thankful?

We definitely did not.

The most we think we ever knew about the Pilgrims was that they came "over" on some boats, set up a village, meet some American Indians, and have a dinner to say thanks. Not much of a history lesson. But that's what makes, Thanksgiving, A Time to Remember, by Barbara Rainey so amazing. In her book, Barbara tells the incredible story of courage, struggles, suffering, loss, and faith.

Complete with names, dates, details, and personal accounts from handwritten journals, Thanksgiving, A Time to Remember, provides an accurate telling of the Pilgrims journey, challenges, and celebration. It's a story of faith and how God continued to protect, provide, and care for the Pilgrims.

Thanksgiving really is a time for us to remember God's faithfulness in our lives. Even with teenagers and our adult kids, we pull out our book and read through the story of the Pilgrims every Thanksgiving. We encourage you to pick up a copy of, Thanksgiving, A Time to Remember, by Barbara Rainey, and read it with your family this Thanksgiving. Click on any of the highlighted links to order your book from Amazon, through our affiliate partnership. It's safe, secure, and doesn't add any additional fees to your purchase! Sign up for Amazon Prime, and get free shipping!

Be sure to check in with us here at Life in the Higham House this holiday season as we share new content as we countdown to Christmas!

- jay & amy

Here are a few of our favorite gift ideas!
​Merry Christmas!

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For as much as we love Christmas, Thanksgiving might be a very close second on our favorite holidays rankings. Yes, we broke the rules this year and pulled out our Christmas decorations, music and movie a little earlier than tradition, but we didn't skip over Thanksgiving. No, we embraced it with both arms and bellies.

With things still out of whack due to the Covid-19 pandemic, everything is looking a little different, especially in how we celebrate the holidays. For Life in the Higham House, we are beginning to recognize that things will probably be different for a while, and not necessarily because of Covid. 

This Thanksgiving there was just 5 of us gathered around the table. Our oldest chose to stay at college for the third year in a row, leaving us with our first empty seat. Our number 2, spent the morning with us, but later left to have dinner with his girlfriend and her family. Out second empty chair. And while this might be a bit upsetting (at first it was), we are coming to grips with the fact that the holiday's will from now on be a little different.

We love to remember the past. Early in our marriage, we made the trips back home to be with family. Packing up the car and making our way to Philadelphia or Baltimore. Then the kids started coming and for a number of years we continued to make the trip, especially for Thanksgiving. But as our lives changed, more kids, big roles in ministry, commitments and sporting events, making the trip home became more and more difficult. Eventually, we had to to make the tough call and just say that we wouldn't be traveling on the holidays. I'm sure this brought dismay and sadness to our parents, but isn't this the way? At some point, going "home" for the holiday's means "staying home" for the holidays.

By staying home we were able to establish our own traditions, creating our own family memories. And with each approaching year, we looked forward to practicing those traditions and creating even more memories. But somewhere in the backs of our minds, we knew our time would come. The time when we would have the empty chairs at the Thanksgiving table.

Yes, we feel the sadness and loss of not having our family all together for Thanksgiving, however, it is forcing us to rethink and reinvent our holiday traditions. This year has helped us turn the page and begin a new chapter in our story.

We realize that if we want to keep our kids plugged in around the holidays, we need to stop living in the past, and start looking towards the future. We often find ourselves remember what it was like with little kids. When we do this, we want to hang on to what was. But we don't have little kids anymore. We have young adults and teenagers. And what our young adults and teenager want to do, isn't what we've always done. Sure, they appreciate the traditions and fond memories, but they're beginning to look ahead at what their lives are going to be.

As parents, we have fought for our family. We have worked hard to be intentional and to make our time with our kids matter. And so this year, we ventured out to start a few new traditions that we hope will help all of us make this all important life transition.

This Thanksgiving we introduced the Family Holiday Game Time. Amy and Breya, came up with the idea of family games while on a walk together. The idea comes as we look to elevate the holiday experience to something more that just sitting in our rooms on our various devices. So with a little planning, Breya came up with a handful of games, while Amy went and shopped for some fun, silly prizes.

Now let me be honest, I wasn't sure how this would all go down. But I liked the idea of trying something new. By the end of the day, I'd say the games were a big hit. We played, we laughed, we knit-picked the rules, laughed some more, and made some brand new memories. It ended up being one of our favorite Thanksgivings, and now we have a new tradition!

I have always held to the hope that as our kids begin their families, our home would be the place where they want to be for the holidays. I dream of having a house that is able to welcome all five kids and their spouses, and the grandkids, for the holidays. I don't suppose that we will all live near one another, but that coming home would be something they would look forward to. And in coming home, we would have the Hallmark holiday as a family. But to get to that place, we have continue to create the space for new ideas, new activities, and new traditions.

Yes, we missed having our two oldest boys at the Thanksgiving table. And yes, we know that at some point someone will say, "we just can't make it home this year." We'll cross that bridge when we get there. But we're not there yet. Christmas now just a couple weeks away. It's time to begin thinking and plan for our time together. Oh, there will be games and prizes, and the opportunity to create a new way of doing the holidays.

- the higham family